And so Oyin Clegg broke out of her depression. Not exactly getting her groove back yet o. And she’s happy, a man might have finally killed the dragon to come rescue her from the dungeon of singleness with his sweetness. See me o, as Ossy is making me wax lyrical. Me that called in sick at work that morning was in a cab enroute the airport, looking all fly, omo toh badt gaan. I wore my favorite jeans, one that made men turn around and take a second look at my behind, and a chiffon top with a hat to match and my very tech specs. I surveyed myself before my mirror for a few minutes. If you can have a tummy like mine at 35 without body magic and lipo, then you are one of the chosen few (some of you will say shebi I haven’t had kids yet, but darris your consign #yimu). Satisfied with what I saw, I called my cab man. I’m one of those that yab people for coming to the airport dressed as if they were going to a Paris runway, but hec, I’m feeling gay and intend to dress every inch so. I tried Ossy’s number again but when it didn’t go through, I kuku sent him a VN, expressing (profuse) thanks and calling him many sweet names I shall not mention to you.
Onto big girl things, I didn’t use any of those painted cabs. My cab man drove a black Honda City, with full blasting ac. With Lagos traffic, caused by unruly drivers, things like Lekki toll gate and the sheer number of we Lagosians that equate owning your own car to a status symbol, the ac is very essential.
After battling mad traffic, I made it to the airport just on time. Thankfully, Ossy had checked me in online and I didn’t have excess luggage, so I just went up, got frisked and went into the waiting area to chill for the next 30minutes for my flight (30mins before is just on time for a flight in Naija). I was so engrossed in the Tunde Leye novel I was reading on my iPad, I didn’t notice her when she walked up to me, until her hands covered the screen. I was about to give it to the person when I saw who it was. And she was the last person I wanted to see.
You know those people that seem to have perfect lives, as against your own. Got into university right out of secondary school when you waited for Jamb for a year. Got a 2 1 while being very popular in school, whereas you had to select which semester you wanted to pass and which you wanted to be social. Has a job just as good as yours. Got married in her mid twenties. Has a fine hubby. Two kids, one boy and one girl. And the person has a way of asking “innocent” questions that are really veiled barbs aimed at you where it pains most. And each time you see her, you are reminded of how much your life is missing. That’s the five foot eight yellow pawpaw standing in front of me now.
“Hi Oyin, so nice to run into you…”
“Moroti, moroti (fake smile from me), how now? Been a while o. where are you headed”.
“My own waka no dey pass UK now. Are you traveling alone? (barb question 1, meaning, hope you have finally found a man)
I responded “Holidaying in Dubai.”
“Abdul is around with the kids o, I left him with them there when I saw you and decided to come say hi”. (Barb 2, meaning some of us have a family we travel with).
We chatted for a bit, and she kept throwing the barbs, until the announcer saved me. Normally, they have to announce like three times before I go and board, but today, before the first announcement was finished, I escaped from Moroti sharply. No goodie two shoes was gonna spoil my mood for this trip.
In no time, I boarded and was glad I had a window seat. On my way in, I had passed one of those agbayas that still dress like Wizkid and Davido wannabes when they’re over thirty. Beats me how a full grown man will want to dress like a boy. Some of them are old enough to be Davido’s daddy o. Anyway, I stowed away my luggage overhead and took my seat.
Not wanting to be disturbed, I looked intently into the window and got lost in thought, oblivious to the goings-on around me.
“Interesting convo with your friend there”, came a thick, rich baritone from beside me, drawing me out of my beautiful thoughts. I turned to see who had such a lovely voice, praying in that breath that the man would match his voice.
Oh my God, yes oh my goodness gracious God. The prayer was answered. Emphatically answered. Resoundingly answered. Beside me was my dream. Taye Diggs complexion. Chocolatey (pronounce Cha-ka-lay-ti 😀 ) Even seated you could tell he was tall. Age, I put somewhere in the range of 37 (yes, I have inbuilt age sensors in my eyes). Well put together. Immaculately dressed. Well manicured finger nails. Those dancing, intelligent kinda eyes. Handsoooooooome. Mo gbe, mo ku, mo daran (in Wande Coal voice inside my head).
I straightened up sharply, thankful I had taken care to dress as well as I did. He introduced himself as Yomi Kester-Jacobs. My head did a quick memory search. It couldn’t be the same Kester-Jacobs, Lagos big family (yes I keep well informed of such). And if I wasn’t mistaken, this Yomi was the scion and only son of that family. “Oyin Clegg”, I said calmly, masking the riot of thoughts going through my mind. “So are you really travelling alone?” he pressed. I didn’t have any qualms admitting that to a dashing stranger who seemed alone himself. “Yeah”, I replied. “And you?”
He was alone too. I knew this Yomi to be single, from the tabloids. I asked if he was just stopping over in Dubai enroute elsewhere in Asia and he wasn’t. He was in Dubai for four days on business. I told him I was in Dubai for five days. “Well, it is not good for man to be alone, so says the Holy Book,” he joked, and then offered to be my company in Dubai. I did a backflip in my mind. “Sure”, I said chic-ily.
By the time I landed in Dubai, I had all but forgotten about Ossy. And so began my whirlwind romance with Lagos big boy, Yomi Kester-Jacobs.
were ni babe yi sha
Baba nla were ni gehl yii..
lmao! similar sentiments lool
hehehehe!Lie that you won’t do the same. I’m so loving Oyin Mehn, she’s chronicling my life
I hope u say that after reading the last episode… Shame
Real WAYRAY!
So i guess Ode Ossy got you a ticket to go cheat on him… what a sucker.
Choi,oyin clegg no dey learn,that geh is something else,she’s got a tough skin tho,she can handle any form of hearthbreak….she fit don dey imagine her name to be Oyin Kester-Jacobs self,she too like to dream,
Hmmm,oyin oyin take it easy !
More…..More…More
Na wao o, this Oyin babe self no go stop to dey amuse me, just like that she forget about Ossy, someone I think she should just settle down with… Well sha, age still dey her side. I wish say she go enjoy her five days stay in Dubai and/or four years stay with Yomi.
My brother Tunde, I guess the story just began. Keep keep until the last episode.
Haba!!!! Oyin!!!! You never learn????? Well cant wait to see how the guy dumped her…..
but i said it last week na, so i’m not surprised!!Oyin, u no dey learn ur lesson, until u r 50 and husbandless, carry on……
Oyin! Don’t come crying after being beaten ooo
HaAAA Oyin Clegg suru ni ko gba oooo . It seems like Ў☺ΰ Å̶̷̩̥͡я€ not tired of heartbreak D̶̲̥̅̊ï$ one go ßε̲̣̣̣̥ life break
Choi… Oyin will not kill me o.. Cha-ka-ley-ti…. Rock on gurl..
This Oyin no dey hear! Kai! Ossy has mumued himself! Oyin, look Ossy side na, ehn babe!
This is the kind of whirlwind romance I love gOoooooosh I wish I were u oyin clegg oooh. darn you for making me feel like jetting off with a hottie like that. Arrrrrrrrrgh whalahi if I dey that flight with you na fight we for fight. Nice write up I think the producers of single ladies should hire you as one of their writers you do it gooooood hmMmmmm.
Oyinnnn>>>>wen will u learn from ur mistakes, u better be smart dis rime around or else u will later found out dat , d so called Yomi kester is married with 2kids
Ohhhhh Oyin! This episode is too short!!! Stop teasing gurl! >=) nice piece though! (Y)
Dis Oyin Cregg is an ashewo. Chei. Na so woman dey like men reach? Infact I’m just irritated at her character.
This just keeps getting ridiculous… But anyway, fact is, if Oyin is wondering WHY she doesn’t have a husband, I think we all know the answer, and I think if she sits down and really thinks about it she too will know the answer as well… Anyways, I’m out. Will probably come back after like 3 new episodes have been posted
oyinnnnnnnnn ku ise up for anoda elaaaaaaaaaaaaa ojukan abi? you no dey learn igboro babe scwhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i tire for ur matter ooooo
TL which one be dis chokolo wey u give us dis week?hmmmmm u wan my trouble abi?
Oyin is really enjoying herself, I hope she uses condoms sha. Anyway this is an interesting story, ride on Oyin and enjoy your holiday.
Lmao, i just knew dis was gonna happen, nd abeg u pple shud stop abusing oyin, tz wat most of us do nd will still do, m luvn dis already 😀
Hmmmm! Na wa 4 u o hiaaaaaa!!! *eyebrows raised*
Babe u seem to attract d best,careful sha………….Cos I see anoda heartache in the offing. That Yomi might just bail out cos he has to marry a Lags bigz gurl of his class.
Ah! This blogger has finished somebody with suspense o! *deep sigh. What can I do but wait?!
You definitely know how to keep your readers on edge,lovely story more more!can’t wait for monday!!!(Big smile)
Oyin, u r not looking for hubby oh, na one man pay for dubai ticket, na another one keep u company, what does that make you?
Like yoruba will say “Wa to te in a big way ” mchewwwww!! 😏 lol i am in luv with this blog
abeg ώħå† sorta story is dis? wtf!!!! Episode rubbish full of nothing…. I shld wait anoda week ƒό̲̣̣̣̥r̲̅. a few lines huh???
Oyin babe, suffer dey smell for ur nose. Love ur blog tho. Its So like what I will do. Better make up ur mind about Ossy fast tho. He won’t do dun-dee for u for life sha. Many cream babes waiting to become wife of oil and gas big boi. Wish u d best
U cld as well v dropped a bomb in my pocket than kill me wit dis suspense!mstcheww!!!lol.fingers crossed and waiting!*singing*episode 8 come quick na!
Oyin Clegg… Sorry, Oyin Tosh…… Pardon me, Oyin Kester-Jacobs…. Lol…… Wa de gba!
Choi Oyin,Oyin…hw many tyms did ii call U̶̲̥̅̊?U̶̲̥̅̊ b runs geh walahi…choi!
Plsssssss twice weekly naaaa!
Hmmmmmm,oyin go come we dey wait,ur village people don start to beat their drum for your head again abi? U no go learn????
Oyin! Na wa 4 u o! E b like say u no want marry, flexin still dey ur body. U beta sit ur ass down and tinfk of gettin serious wif ossy. Gosh hw I wish dat ossy guy can come my way!
Lmfao. In God’s time.
Ha! Oyin! I A̶̲̅м̣̣̇ speechless! ԁӓȶ’s wat U̶̲̥̅̊ make m̶̲̥̅̊ε̲̣̣̣̥ . I cant wait ƭő see U̶̲̥̅̊ molested again. ‘Oniranu Oshi’ =))=Dlaffº˚˚°º≈wanº˚˚°º≈tearº˚˚°º≈myº˚˚°º≈belleº˚˚°º≈=))
Articulate and brilliant piece.Bet why wud u have a man like Ossy all over you and ya still single.Anyways,that’s the irony of life.We always want what we can’t have. I hope you haven’t started imagining Oyin Kester-Jacobs. That’s playing with fire o. Can’t wait for ur next piece.
oyin, biko aha chineke kam ji yo gi, if u want dis kester-jacobs den play hard to get using ossy to keep urself company doing it cos i’m sure kester-jacobs is used to gettng chicks easily
OyiIiiiiiiiiiiin,if u come home crying eeenh,u wii see weeeeeeeen! u can like to gimme Ossy’s number sha.
Dis babe clearly enjoys heartbreak. Na heart-shattering-to-pieces she don set hersef up for. Can’t wait for d next edition. Yummy! Yummy!!
It happens u know…..
She amazes me tho ahn ahn! Seriously #smh for her o…….. Can’t wait for the next episode 🙂
Really? Reading Tunde leye’s novel.
Lmao dressed like wizkid n davido, you’re not serious.
Nice 1 man.
Love this Oyin girl.
Wow! Nice piece. Keep it up! Looking 4ward 2 d next episode
Luvly story line
Pls keep posting
Dream on babe…..abeg,when is the next episode coming out oh? Can’t wait. Oyin,I have MAN for ΰ oh! I AM FR***ING SERIOUS.
Next episode is on Monday… Serious ke? #yimu
I’ve read everything on this blog from the beginning till today!!! Gosh!!!
Lol hilarious!
Oyin more jist abeg
Women, smh
I tink u shld consider makin dis into series, I wld rada watch dat dan superstory……nyc writing, gud concept
I love d flow, d suspense much though but its . Wld love 2get 2d root, thank u.
But it beats me, ose fi eru e le si shokoto losi sokoto meanin wat she wants is right there wit her in Lagos but yet she keeps searchin else whr, wats wrong wit Ossy? smh!
Maybe na beating Oyin go get this time…another sexcapade to talk about.
Confused Oyin. Just like †ђξ waves of †ђξ sea…she just flows with any tide(man). A lotta ladies av dis kinda mentality and d sad part is dat they can endure any for of heart break…
Oyin! I knew you were going to forget about Ossy, but didn’t know ’twas going be that soon. Sha enjoy the moment while it lasts, that’s the way forward jare
We are longing for the next episode o! ehn ehn! It better not take to long o! Besides, we will soon vote for the twice weekly updates – I read all 7 at a go and I still can’t wait for the next = addicted. Thumbs up!
I got this link today and have read all 7 already! Great narrative. I sorta found myself praying Ossy would pop up @ the lounge or in d next seat, too bad for him or is it her?
Hmm only u how many men , no dey lie give us chop jor, if nah so ee bi , all d fyne babes 4 don get husband nah, ode Oshi.
So….
More!! Pleassseee
Α̲̅♍ enjoying this
Wow….dem beg me beg me taya to read dis blog. Now I read am and I go read am again. Make I rest my bele muscles for now. Brilliant write-up!!!
Dis Oyin gaan sef! All that glitters isn’t gold oo
I must commend ur efforts @ tl. Dis is a creative masterpiece dat kips d readers in d realm of insatiable suspence 4 a week long. Kudos. More power to ur elbows.Oyin,pls follow ur heart.Wat assurance do we av dat Ossy wudnt change afta getting wat he wants from her.All his kind gestures r aimed @sometin now. Oyin,I jst want u 2be careful cos Yomi appears too gud to be true.(Pls tl, reply me wit ur email addy, I wanto send u a mail) great work here.
Serious setting P going on here o! ATTN!!! Some r reading, some are yapping, others are finding partners! Issorai
omo to shan lo ma pa ara re. Oyin u sure need deliverance
Afi taye diggs naa… Lmao!! Nice…. Proceeding to 8 ryt away!!!
This gehl u r sick, shikena
ah aha ah ah ah Oyin, you will never learn a lesson. Rubbish!
Wow! What can I say! Ossy, ur money has entered voicemail! Had u known, u wd have paid for just a trip to the airport! But oyin, u do know that this guy is an impersonator rt? He profiled u from the onset!
Oni ranu omo…ahan
Rubbish
Babe! U supposed chop cane. So wats gonna happen to our Osita. U ve followed omo baba olowo.
ahh!! lol poor ossy #routingfortheunderdog
I suggest 10yrs imprisonment for every “wizkid or davido wannabe dresser” out der!
Oyin cleg must be crazy o. Must she jump on evryman?
Femi no try, didn’t do enough. He should have prolonged his revenge, made Ɣǿǔ fall in Love and DESTROYED your heart cos Ɣǿǔ don’t deserve one
Hilarious! Choi!
Choi! Oyin o! Give ossy a chance na!
well, blames r unnecessary in life’s situations cos u never know wat u’ll do if were in d same shoes,
buh seriously, gurls never learn, they always hav dez ambiguous dreams dat always make em ditch nice guys & go for players, only to get their hearts broken to say all guys r d same, which to me is d dumbest phenomenom ever.
Oyin……bigman big wahala
Abeg this gher don dey piss me off. Nah so your pant hot? *eye rolling*
Thought Ɣ☺ΰ will learn a lesson from the previous acts… Anyway loving Ūя̲̅ gist shall…
Na wa o,
U don’t learn.
Let’s see how far dis can go.
Lmao, ori girl yi ti yi sha….haba!!
Oyin deserves EVERY misfortune that comes her way!!!
Seriously!…mehn,Oyin,ur eye too dey chuck o
Not sure if in the last paragraph, “I had all but
forgotten about Ossy” is what you intended to say. you may want to check that. Other than that your blog is quite entertaining 😀
Wayre leleyi sha #eyesrolling..Girls, ladies, women, whatever y’all are called. ‘By the time I landed in Dubai, I had all but forgotten about Ossy. And so began my whirlwind romance with Lagos big boy, Yomi Kester-Jacobs.’ I hope and pray he ( Yomi ) turns out to be gay or farts and snores while sleeping or something.. Mtcheww!
Hahaha omo ale buruku………. TL dat was for oyin clegg oooh …….lol
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Kul write up
Cool
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Am loving this good job